So it has happened yet again.

Meagan awakes at 4 am, stirs for a sec then goes into a fit of sheer terror screams AGAIN. Pick her up to console her and she is heavy like a dead body. I don't think I can take much more of feeling my daughters almost dead body. (I've had experiences of what cats and dog feel like just after passing, the weight of their muscles dragging as if there is no control of them)

I race upstairs and wake Chris up, getting dress for the hospital. THANK GOD we live 3 minutes away. Five if we get the red lights. Get her temp checked and heart rate is marked down, as well as how many breaths per minute she's taking. Temp ok (36.5 rectically) yet she's clammy. She's smiling at the nurse, and I mentioned of some red spotting around her mouth, come to think of it I had never seen those spots before, wait a minute I have. LAST TIME when she lost consciences. Wait around for 15 minutes until we get called into a room. By this time we've been at the hospital for 40 minutes now. Wait and wait, for 35 minutes until young doc comes along.

HE wants me to tell him what made me come to the ER. Well she woke screaming and felt like dead weight "well what do you mean dead weight??" with that puzzled look on his face. LIKE A DEAD BODY YOU IDIOT, NO CONTROL OF HER MUSCLE TONE. He would barely hear me out about how this happened 2 weeks ago. He checks her heart rate and says. "nothing we can do mame. You can go home!" while looking at me like I'm one of THOSE paranoid mothers that rush to ER for the little's of things.

that's it, my daughter has a second episode of something in 2 weeks and I get brushed off like that. I ask for the discharge papers and he says "no you don't need those, just follow up with your family doc in the morning" MOTHER FUCKER. My daughter could have something terribly wrong with her heart, nervous system, lungs WHO knows, and this is what I get. DUMB FUCK.

SO I get back to the doc in the afternoon. Find out that the pediatric cardiologist is booking into JULY, well the Nurse at my docs office says "how ridiculous is that this is a 4 1/2 month old child that has had 2 episodes in 2 weeks, You have got to be kidding me to wait 6 months" SO the receptionist on the other hand asked for the referral again, since they have seemed to have missed placed the original. And that if my doc is so Concerned that he should call and speak with the specialist himself.

SO my doc is planning on calling this guy on wed, and he has already warned me that this Doctor does not have the greatest Bedside manners. DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THAT. But he's the best in the region apparently. Like I told my nurse, I'll go anywhere to get my daughter checked out, if a doc up in Barrie or hell even Sudbury has something next week. I'll go, I don't care what it takes she NEEDS to be looked after.